Your Honda has what’s called a CVT which stands for Constantly Variable Transmission. That means it’s not a conventional transmission, but uses a system of cones and belts that allows for different drive ratios. Generally speaking, when a CVT displays this type of behaviour, it’s often time for a new transmission which won’t be cheap.

But in the case of the Honda, the problem is not always terminal. Because Honda designed and built its own CVT (rather than just buy one in) the engineering in it seems better than most. And experience has shown that often, problems with a Honda CVT simply means the fluid that provides the drive and lubricates the CVT, needs to be changed.

That said, refusing to select Drive is a pretty major fault, so a trip to a specialist might be in order. But first, check the level of the fluid in the CVT to see if it's low, as that could be the root problem. Even so, you’ll still then have to find the leak as this is a sealed system and shouldn’t require top-ups.

Yes, I think the dealer is doing the appropriate thing. It’s not unusual for a whole door to be replaced; it’s easier and quicker to do that than repair the door panel. For you the end result is almost certainly better doing it that way. There’s no reason or justification to replace the car.

By buying a new HR-V you’re getting the benefits of driving a car that no one has driven before you, you know its history, so it’s a know quantity. By buying a used car you are gambling that it has been looked after, it hasn’t been crashed or damaged in any major way. You’re also buying a car that will have done upwards of 100,000 km, so its usable life going forward is reduced compared to a new car. As long as the HR-V fits your needs and wants it’s probably the best way to go.