What's the difference?
The Porsche Cayenne Turbo GT needs a better name. This is the king of Cayennes and quite possibly the ruler of all super SUVs.
Well, the Cayenne Turbo GT is the fastest SUV around the Nurburgring Nordschleife. Not just that, it has such colossal power and torque it'll be side-by-side with a Porsche 911 GT3 RS in a sprint from 0-100km/h. No, a better name for this SUV would be the Cayenne GT3.
Which is perfect for me because I'm at the point in my life where although I love full-on and noisy cars I also have a full-on and noisy family.
We lived with the Cayenne Turbo GT for a week to find out if this super SUV was also a super family car - from practicality to safety.
We're also a family with ridiculously high expectations of luxury SUVs having lived with and tested each of the Cayenne Turbo GT's rivals - from the Lamborghini Urus and Bentley Bentayga to the Aston Martin DBX and Alfa Romeo Stelvio Quadrifoglio.
You know when you're walking along the footpath and you come to a soft spongey bit that the council have put in around a tree and your mind goes: "Whoah, the ground is bouncy but it looks just like bitumen?!"
Well that's the kind of response you'll get from people when they think they're looking at a regular BMW 7 Series, only to have their world go a bit bouncy when they see the Alpina B7 badge on the back of this car as you're overtaking them at Warp Factor 9000.
And you will be overtaking them like a blur because, thanks to the elves at German tuning house Alpina, the B7 is hugely fast for a five-seat, 5.3m-long, 2.2 tonne limo. But then the B7 is fast for any type of car of any dimensions, because with its 330km/h top speed this beast will outrun a McLaren 570GT. Yes, seriously.
Based on the BMW 750Li long wheelbase, the B7 begins life rolling down the same production line as a regular 7 Series. Alpina then goes on to make so many changes to the engine and chassis that the German government requires the BMW VIN to be replaced with a new one.
Ready to find out more? Well there's so much to see here that things may go a bit weird and bouncy again. Be prepared.
Of all the super SUVs I've piloted, the Porsche Cayenne Turbo GT is the best all-rounder in terms of performance, comfort, cabin technology and style.
As a family car it's roomy, practical and easy to use and drive daily.
As a performance car the Turbo GT is stupidly quick, with the agility of a sports car. Sure, a 911 would leave it behind on a twisty race track, but this SUV is close to having that sportscar experience and keeping your family, as well.
The BMW Alpina B7 is a special car destined (like all Alpinas) to be a collector's item, due to its rarity and exclusivity. I asked Alpina just how many current model B7s there are in Australia and the answer was "less than five", which is just as mysterious as most people find the car in general.
The B7 is fast – too fast to enjoy legally on Australian roads – but it is also supremely comfortable and well appointed. For Alpina fans lucky enough to be driven in on,e this would make for a truly rare and niche way to be chauffeured.
This might be a personal thing but to me nearly all Porsches look better from the back than the front.
It's the wide stance and powerful haunches, the hunkered down suction-capped-to-the-road look that does it for me and the Cayenne Turbo GT, despite being an SUV, passes this important Porsche checklist item.
The GT aero kit only serves to make this SUV look more of a beast, and the gold-bronze looking satin Neodyne wheels are a Porsche theme that I've not always been a fan of, but I get the historic connection.
If only the Turbo GT could look a little less like other Cayennes from the front. This is the king of the SUV range and despite the apron and bumper already being exclusive to this model, there should be more.
Vents in the wheel arches, carbon bonnet with nostrils GT3-style perhaps? Or is that going too far? If you do want something more lairy then there's always the Urus.
The Cayenne Turbo GT's cabin is stunning in its plushness and modern surprises such as the passenger display, the hoodless instrument digital cluster, the lashings of Race-Tex upholstery everywhere. It's perfectly Porsche. High-performance meets high-end.
It's also highly practical. Let's talk about that.
This is a good place to start because the B7 looks just like the 750Li it's based on, until you see the first tell-tale signs that it's not one.
There's the front wing with Alpina lettering and the boot-top spoiler, the graphics, which run the length of the car, and the 20-spoke wheels with Alpina badging.
This is late '70s, early '80s styling at its best (and possibly worst), but these special cars can pull off the irony-free look because this is how Alpina BMWs have rolled since 1975, when the E21 320-based Alpina A1/3 was launched.
BMW badges have been left on the bonnet and boot, but there's Alpina B7 BiTurbo lettering in place of the 7 Series identifier.
Most people walked by it in the street thinking it was just a big BMW, others scratched their heads wondering what I'd done to my big German limo and a handful almost dropped to their knees in praise and wonderment at spotting a rare beast like this in the wild.
These people all had their own Alpina stories – one was the third generation of an Alpina-owning family. You become a member a small and passionate club when you buy into this rarefied brand.
The standard B7's cabin is close to identical to the luxurious interior of the 750Li, save for Alpina-embossed stitching in the headrests of the soft, leather seats, the virtual instrument cluster and the Alpina plaque on the centre console denoting the build number.
The B7 is long, low and wide at just under 5.3m end to end, 1.5m tall and 1.9m across. A 3.2m wheelbase means cabin room is more than just spacious.
The B7 rolls off the Dingolfing production line in Germany and is then handed over to Alpina's facility in Buckle, where significant changes take place. Read on to find out how the B7 is different from a regular 750Li.
The Porsche Cayenne Turbo GT only makes one compromise on practicality and that's the removal of the middle seat in the back, which, with just two kids isn't used all the time but on average we might need it once a week for school mates and cousins.
Instead of a middle seat there is a shallow tray, which will fit a phone or in our case leaves and rocks found at the park.
So, yes, the Turbo GT is a four-seater only, but this is a spacious, large SUV with good head and legroom, wide-opening doors for easy entry and exit, and air suspension which can raise and lower the height for easy access.
Storage is excellent with enormous door pockets in the front and back and there are four cupholders.
There's a wireless phone charger in the front and two USB-C ports as well, plus two USB-C sockets in the back.
Four-zone climate control means the kids in the back can set their own temperatures. They also have heated seats.
I was disappointed to see there aren't sunshades for the rear windows - pretty vital in Australia where it feels like we're only about 50 metres away from the sun.
The Turbo GT's 576-litre boot just managed to fit our pram and a week's shopping, which is our minimum standard for living. Any more space is a bonus.
The B7 is a five-seater limousine although with the fold-down rear centre armrest which houses the media control panel the back is really set up to carry two.
That 3.2m wheelbase means cabin space is enormous. At 191cm tall I can sit behind my driving position with about 30cm between my knees and the seatback. Those rear doors open wide and the entrance is huge, making entry and exit almost as easy as just walking through a doorway. The air suspension also rises and lowers the B7's ride height for better access.
Storage is excellent, with two cupholders and door pockets for rear passengers, along with the area inside the centre armrest.
Up front, the driver and co-pilot have a deep centre console storage bin with split-opening lid, two cupholders and door pockets.
Luggage space is good, with a 515-litre boot.
The Turbo GT is the king of Cayennes, so it shouldn't surprise anybody that it's also the most expensive with its list price of $364,700.
Lamborghini's Urus lists for $409,744 and is the Cayenne Turbo GT's not-so-subtle Italian cousin, sharing the same platform and engine.
Both are in my mind the best performance SUVs on the planet. It just depends how conspicuous you want to be.
Then there's Bentley's V8 Bentayga which isn't blessed with the Porsche's good looks but would still be all over the Cayenne if the two happened to meet at a race track.
So, why is the GT Turbo the king of the Cayennes? What makes it better? For all the reasons you'd think - it's the fastest, most powerful, most luxurious and most equipped Cayenne in the range.
We'll get into mind-bending engine and performance specs soon, but first let me take you through the standard features on a car that's anything but standard.
Coming standard and exclusively to the Turbo GT are 22-inch 'GT Design' wheels in satin 'Neodyne' with full-colour Porsche centre caps, an active rear spoiler, Turbo GT front apron, dual titanium exhaust, rear apron with diffuser, 'SportDesign' side skirts, wheel arch extensions, a lightweight carbon roof and tinted LED HD-matrix headlights.
Inside, and also exclusive to this grade, is the 'GT Interior Package' with 'Race-Tex' upholstery throughout with 'Deep Sea Blue' stitching on the front seats and centre console and the armrests and dashboard.
There's also the 'Carbon Interior Package' which includes dashboard and door trim elements.
Race-Tex trim is applied to the 'GT Sports' steering wheel, roof lining and gearshift, too.
The adaptive active air suspension, which can lower the car by 15mm, is standard and only available on the Turbo GT, too.
The soft-close doors are standard (a cost option on lower grades), as are the stainless steel pedal covers.
The rest of the features are also found on lower grades and include the 12.65-inch digital instrument cluster, head-up display, proximity unlocking, 12.3-inch multimedia touchscreen with sat nav, wireless Apple CarPlay and Android Auto, digital radio, a 10-speaker Bose sound system, heated front seats, rear privacy glass and an auto tailgate.
Four-zone climate control is standard on the GT Turbo, too, and so are heated rear seats.
Our car had several options fitted such as the front passenger display ($2860) and the Deep Sea Blue Accent Package.
The passenger display is a crowd pleaser, but as a family car my kids felt like they were missing screens in the back seats, too. Well, in my day...
The B7 lists for $389,955, while a 750li is about $319,000. At this level, $70K seems like a downright reasonable premium to pay for a faster, more powerful, better handling and comfier version of the 750Li.
In this case you're paying more but getting more, although standard features are close to identical. There's adaptive LED headlights, head-up display, night vision with pedestrian detection, a 10.25-inch touch screen up front and two screens in the second row for TV and other media functions.
There's a reversing camera, sat nav, harman/kardon surround stereo and Apple CarPlay. There's leather upholstery, seat massagers in the front and rear, four-zone climate control, heated and ventilated front and rear seats, front and rear parking sensors, auto tailgate, sunblinds for the rear and rear-side windows and proximity key.
The safety features are listed in the section below, and that list is also impressive.
Rivals to the B7 include the Mercedes-AMG S63, which lists for $375,000, the $331,700 Audi S8 and even the Bentley Flying Spur, which almost matches its price at $389,500.
As a middle-aged parent with two children, a Porsche that I don't have to crawl into and out of like a cubby house is a great thing.
What's even better is that this ‘easy access' Porsche is every bit as brutally powerful and fast as the quintessentially ‘pure' Porsche, the 911. Actually, it's more powerful and faster.
The Turbo GT's twin-turbo 4.0-litre V8 petrol engine makes 485kW and 850Nm with drive going through an eight-speed transmission to all four wheels.
In comparison, a Porsche 911 GT3 RS, arguably the most brutal and anti-social 911, has 386kW/485Nm.
I haven't made a mistake. Those are the real numbers. And it's only when you step on the accelerator in the Cayenne Turbo GT, and it feels like somebody's sat down on your chest, that you realise what a big deal this is.
That is such a colossal amount of oomph that this 2.2-tonne family SUV can accelerate from 0-100km/h in 3.3 seconds.
The 911 GT3 RS can do it in 3.2 and it has a roll cage and a fixed rear wing the size of a bedroom door.
And yes, we're now coming into a digital age where Teslas and other electric SUVs are quick, too, but can they go around corners like a Porsche Cayenne Turbo GT?
Do they have the same rumble and roar as a twin-turbo V8 that's terrifying and enticing at the same time.
The correct answer is, absolutely not.
Alpina takes the 4.4-litre twin turbo V8 from the BMW 750Li and rebuilds the engine by hand. Alpina fits its own turbochargers, air-intake set -up, high-capacity cooling system and Akrapovic quad exhaust. Output is 447kW and 800Nm – an increase of a whopping 117kW and 150Nm over the 750Li's grunt.
It's interesting to note that the V12-powered 760Li has a smidge more power, at 448kW, and the same torque output as the B7.
How fast is the B7? Supercar fast – the B7 has a top speed of 330km/h, which will see it outrun a McLaren 570 and almost keep up with a Ferrari F12. That's quite incredible for a 2.3-tonne limousine with three TVs on board. A 0-100km/h time of 4.2 seconds is also hugely impressive.
In comparison, a 750Li has a 0-100km/h time of a not-too-shabby 4.7 seconds, but the car is electronically limited to 250km/h.
An eight-speed automatic transmission shifts gears smoothly, although a little slowly in Normal mode, while Sport and Sport+ add urgency and harder shifts.
Finally, the B7 is all-wheel drive, and those rear wheels are designed to steer slightly for better cornering performance.
Seriously? This is a 2.0-tonne twin-turbo petrol V8 with a 90-litre fuel tank. Even the Porsche specs sheet doesn't understand the question because in the column for fuel efficiency there are three letters - tbc.
My own testing saw me record 22.5 L/100km at the fuel pump, which means I enjoyed driving the car very much.
A little digging around reveals Porsche globally claims the Turbo GT will use 12.6L/100km, over a combination of open and urban roads.
You might not have as much fun as I did but easing back a little might get you closer to the 700km of range this more frugal consumption figure appears to offer.
While efficient it isn't, I'm not going to mark the Turbo GT too much here because compared to its petrol rivals the fuel consumption is what I'd expect from such a high-output heavy SUV.
The B7 is probably not the car to own if you're concerned about either fuel prices or emissions, but then the twin-turbo V8 may not be as thirsty as you'd think, with Alpina stating that, after a combination of urban and open-road driving, you should only use 9.6L/100km.
My time in the B7 saw me double that usage but this could have had something to do with me turning off the stop-start system and driving in Sport mode constantly.
Never have I met a car this powerful and superbly athletic that is as pleasurable to drive alone on great, fast roads as it is to pilot at 50km/h in the suburbs with a family on board.
It exceeds my understanding of engineering that something this large can move so quickly. That in an instant can turn and tip into a corner with such precision and effortlessness.
Yet it can switch seamlessly and happily to coping with speed bumps and potholes, delivering a ride so comfortable it'll send babies off to sleep. And it did.
The only issue, and this is such a tiny thing, is the dash-mounted gearshift, which means having to reach up and select Drive or Reverse or Park, which, when executing a three-point turn, is necessarily frustrating.
Still, I'm giving the Turbo GT a 10 out of 10 for driving under all conditions, and we didn't even go off-road, which of course you can do, as long as it's not too wild.
Who on Earth thinks a BMW 750Li isn't fast enough or comfortable enough, even with all its horsepower, luxurious cabin and technology? Alpina, that's who.
Redevelopment of the 4.4-litre V8 with new turbochargers, a high-capacity cooling system, different air suspension set-up and an exhaust system made by Akrapovic have made this already exceptional car better. Better to drive and better to be driven in.
The ride, even on those 21-inch wheels and low-profile Michelin Pilot Super Sport tyres (255/35 ZR21 on the front and 295/30 ZR 21 on the rear) is incredibly comfortable. I drove it and also had a chance to recline in the back and be chauffeured (by our photographer) and the ride was so composed and refined it was hard to believe I was travelling along some truly awful urban roads with their cracked and pot-holed surfaces.
And it's quiet, too. Which will suit those in the back being transported swiftly from the airport to their next meeting, but if you're after a loud and angry exhaust note then you won't find it in the B7. Sure, from the outside at full throttle the B7 has a menacing growl, but this isn't a BMW M car that will bark and snarl.
See, while BMW's M division makes brutal, loud, high-performance versions of their regular cars, Alpina makes comfortable, stealthy, high-performance ones.
All-wheel drive provides fantastic traction and ensures that grunt doesn't just tear the tyres off those rims when you sneeze on the throttle.
And while the air-suspension is soft and comfortable, adaptive dampers adjust for when the road goes twisty, providing impressive handling for a heavy and long car.
Really, though, the B7 is built for long, endless stretches of roads, and the acceleration beyond 100km/h is almost as startling as that from 0-100km/h, as it wants to push straight past 200km/h towards that 330km/h top speed.
Which, unless you know a good lawyer or happen to be one, will send you straight to jail. Yes, the B7 is probably too much car for Australian roads. Only on a German autobahn would a B7 be fully at home.
I felt like I was given a Melbourne Cup-winning racehorse for a week but could only ride it in my suburban backyard.
The Porsche Cayenne Turbo GT hasn't been locally crash tested and so doesn't have an ANCAP rating.
That's quite normal for super high-end cars. But, when this third-generation model first arrived in 2017 it was tested by ANCAP's European equivalent, Euro NCAP, and was awarded the maximum five stars.
There's AEB which operates at city, urban and highway speeds, and lane keeping assistance, and lane change assistance which is a form of blind-spot warning, and adaptive cruise control. You can option rear cross-traffic alert, as well.
A space saver spare wheel is under the boot floor.
The Alpina B7 comes with all of the BMW 750Li's safety equipment – this includes AEB, lane-keeping assistance and lane-departure warning, blind-spot warning, active cruise control, night vision with object recognition, auto parking and surround view camera.
Along with the suite of airbags, there's traction and stability control and ABS, as you'd expect.
The 750Li and B7 have not been given an ANCAP score.
The Cayenne Turbo GT is covered by Porsche's three-year, unlimited kilometre warranty, which is lagging behind in terms of duration even compared to other luxury brands such as Mercedes-Benz, which offers five years.
Servicing is recommended annually or every 15,000km, although there isn't a capped price maintenance plan with final costs determined at the dealer level (in line with variable labour rates by state or territory).
The B7 is covered by BMW's three-year, unlimited-kilometre warranty. Servicing is recommended every 12 months or 15,000km. The B7 is covered by BMW special vehicles servicing plan, which means services are cost-free for the first three years of the car's life.