Porsche Cayenne vs Ford Tourneo Custom

What's the difference?

The Porsche Cayenne Turbo GT needs a better name. This is the king of Cayennes and quite possibly the ruler of all super SUVs.

Well, the Cayenne Turbo GT is the fastest SUV around the Nurburgring Nordschleife. Not just that, it has such colossal power and torque it'll be side-by-side with a Porsche 911 GT3 RS in a sprint from 0-100km/h. No, a better name for this SUV would be the Cayenne GT3.

Which is perfect for me because I'm at the point in my life where although I love full-on and noisy cars I also have a full-on and noisy family.

We lived with the Cayenne Turbo GT for a week to find out if this super SUV was also a super family car - from practicality to safety.

We're also a family with ridiculously high expectations of luxury SUVs having lived with and tested each of the Cayenne Turbo GT's rivals - from the Lamborghini Urus and Bentley Bentayga to the Aston Martin DBX and Alfa Romeo Stelvio Quadrifoglio.

This idea hasn’t always worked out too well. Take a parcel-van (in this case the Ford Transit Custom) strip out the rubber matting and cargo barrier and bolt six or seven seats into what was the load area. Sure, the original vehicle to use this concept, the Volkswagen Kombi way back in the 1950s, got away with it, possibly because there wasn’t anything better around.

Ford has plenty of history with this notion, too. The first Transit of 1965 was also available as a mini-bus, but worked okay because the Transit itself was such a car-like departure from the commercial-vehicle norm.

Things didn’t go so well for Ford in the early 1980s, however, when the Econovan-badged parcel van it shared with Mazda (the E2200) was fitted with eight seats, given some fuzzy velour trim and dubbed the Spectron. And it was dreadful. In fact, so bad, that it made the contemporaneous Mitsubishi Nimbus and the even more forgettable Nissan Prairie seem like vastly superior alternatives to the job of moving people. Only because they were.

Early versions of the Spectron retained the Econovan’s crude suspension, wheezy (and fragile) little engines and even the tiny dual rear wheels that entirely deprived the vehicle of any traction. In fact, dreadful doesn’t even cover it.

So you can see why Ford might be a bit antsy about me referring to the new Tourneo (a badge that has been around in Europe for decades) as a Transit Custom with extra seats and windows. Yet that kind of sums it up (up to a point, anyway). Luckily, the Transit Custom itself is a pretty sorted thing these days, so maybe Ford has nothing to worry about. Maybe…